How brain cancer has turned into a blessing…

I have wanted to write this for a while now in hopes that my story can one day help or inspire someone else. I just want to say upfront that this diagnosis has changed my life in a good way. No, it’s not what I would have chosen to go through, but I have experienced so many blessings along the way. My faith has grown tremendously, I have discovered an even deeper understanding of the power of our mind, I love on a deeper level, my priorities aligned very quickly and I truly focus on having a balanced body. The importance of sleep, community, spirituality, low inflammatory diet, meditation/stress management, and exercise became a priority. I have learned the difference of true joy versus happiness, and how to be in the present moment.

Here we go...

I was fit. I had ZERO symptoms or signs that anything could be wrong. I exercised 5-6 days a week and I ate healthy. My diet wasn’t perfect. I still enjoyed a margarita and Mexican food along with a cookie here and there. I’m telling you this only to say that a healthy diet and exercise will not fully eliminate the possibility of getting cancer, but it will lessen it for many types of cancer. Exercise and healthy eating will help your odds, and it will aid in your recovery. Unfortunately, we are exposed to so many toxins in the environment that we aren’t even aware of. These toxins play a huge part in our cellular health.

I felt good. I had just been recruited to work for a large nutrition company as their operations manager and I was loving it. Nutrition and helping others really is my passion in life! And I now believe a part of my purpose is to help empower others through nutrition and fitness.

Here is how it all began…

One Friday morning I woke with David standing over me urging me to get up. His words were very matter-of-fact “We are going to the emergency room. You just had a seizure.” I was very confused and he looked terrified. He informed me again that I had just had a seizure. I had no idea, at that moment, that my life would change forever. Or even more shockingly, just how much it would change…

What a blessing that they forced me to go!

I went through the normal battery of tests. My blood work came back great. I was then sent for a CT scan where they saw something on my brain. An MRI with contrast was then ordered. They asked if I had any trauma such as a concussion or blow to the head. I couldn’t recall anything.

Not long after the MRI the nurse asked me to call my husband in from the parking lot so that we could review the results. I knew that if they were allowing him in it wasn’t good. He came into the room with me and the doctor entered not long after and delivered the news that I had an extremely large tumor on the right frontal lobe of my brain and that I would need emergency surgery the next morning to remove it. The funny thing is I don’t ever remember being overly alarmed. Maybe I was in denial or I just always assume the best and that all will be fine.

From there I was moved into a room on the cancer floor. No one had even mentioned the word cancer until the surgeon came in the next morning. He was very calming and I felt like I was in great hands. He said that he did feel the tumor was cancerous, but maybe only a grade 2 or 3. That I might have to do a little radiation after surgery. He told us we could go ahead and do the surgery, but his “A” team wasn’t working over the weekend. He felt that it would be fine to wait until Thursday morning. We of course opted for the “A” team since it was my brain and checked out of the hospital.

The days leading up to surgery really are a blur. I don’t ever really remember being overwhelmed. I do remember having a fear that I wouldn’t be the same person when I woke up from surgery. What if I didn’t remember my husband or my child? What if I couldn’t work or work out?

For the next few days, we spent time as a family. Mary Grace stayed home from school. We had family pictures taken. My parents visited regularly. We all prayed constantly. I worked a little here and there. The night before surgery all of our family came and we prayed and had dinner together. Hugged and kissed and told them I would see them in a few short days. I felt confident that surgery would go well and I would be on my way to recovery in no time.

The alarm went off a little after 4 am the next morning. David and I sat up, prayed together, and proceeded to get dressed in silence. We prayed in the car again once we parked at the hospital and walked in just before 5 am for surgery and most likely a 2-week stay after surgery.

Once checked in our incredible nursing staff allowed David to bring in Mary Grace so that she wouldn’t have to sit in the car. We were still in the midst of Covid rules and were only allowing 1 visitor. I’m so grateful for their care and big hearts.

The doctor wasn’t sure how long I would be out after surgery, but he assured David he would come and talk to him right after surgery. He did just as he said he would where he reported that he thought he got all of the tumor and that it was cancerous, but again he thought grade 2 or 3 by the way it looked and felt. Within a few hours after surgery, I woke up and started asking to see David and Mary Grace. David was relieved that I knew who he was and that the doctor felt confident that he got all of the tumor.

I was moved into ICU where I had the most incredible nurses! They allowed David, Mary Grace, and my mom to visit. I will say that I’m a firm believer that having family and friends by your side aids in recovery! Within 24 hours I was up and walking laps around the ICU. I remember the look from nurses in the ICU and them telling me that I didn’t belong there. I agreed! I knew that movement was going to be a key to my recovery and spending less time in the hospital. I had various different neurological tests that I passed and was then moved into a regular room where I only stayed for about 12 hours before they discharged me against my husband's wishes. On the other hand, we knew that if I could get home and get back to my environment we knew that my healing would be much greater supported and recovery would go a lot better.

Once I got home we still had to wait on the pathology report to determine my next steps. This felt like an eternity, but I felt confident that everything would be fine. We even went back for my first follow-up and the doctor didn’t have the pathology yet. He felt confident that it was a lower-grade cancer and that it was taking longer because the lower-grade cancer cells could sometimes blend and look like healthy cells. He felt that if it were serious they would have already had the report back. We left and I was really feeling confident that it was nothing serious. We returned the following week and were informed that it was a grade 4 tumor. My husband wanted to know how long I had to live. I only wanted to know what treatment was being recommended and get the heck out of there.

I do remember thinking “great this is what eating healthy and exercising has gotten me.” In hindsight, healthy eating and exercise got me a quicker recovery than most from surgery and the ability to handle chemo better than many.

I was overwhelmed because it was not what I was expecting, but I knew that I wasn’t having a prognosis conversation with doctors. We called my parents to come to the house and picked Mary Grace up from school to deliver the news in person. It took me a few hours to face the brutal facts of reality and then decide that I was going to beat this.

David and I went for a walk that evening and I told him that I was going to win in the end. “I’m going to beat this”.

I told him that I needed his full support and that any worry and scared emotions had to be discussed with friends and not with me. I needed everyone else around me to believe as much as I believed that I was going to win.

For the next few weeks, we visited the oncologist, the radiation doctor, my primary physician, and my functional doctor to begin to set up treatments. I started every visit and every conversation with “just so you know…I’m going to beat this”. They never once disagreed. My functional doctor helped me with a cleanse to alkalize my body before I started chemo and radiation. My oncologist and radiation doctor were on board with me using natural medicine along with allopathic treatment.

In the meantime, we pushed for a second opinion at MD Anderson. We had friends making phone calls and I was calling daily to see if we could get in before radiation began here in Atlanta. We got an appointment. My best friend booked our hotel, my mother-in-law booked our plane tickets and my mom sent me with her Amex to pay for the appointment since our insurance didn’t cover anything out of state. I still to this day am not convinced that they truly did their own pathology on my tumor. They received the slides from Atlanta the day before my appointment. Their findings were exactly the same as the pathology findings from Atlanta. It was a blessing because they recommended the same exact treatment as my doctors in Atlanta. I didn’t care for the doctor that we met with at MD Anderson. She told me that eating healthy and taking supplements of any kind would not necessarily help in any way. She was in no way supportive of a keto diet and told me that there were not any studies to support it helping. My oncologist, radiation doctor, surgeon, and functional doctor all recommended a keto diet. In fact, my oncologist who consults with Duke’s Brain Center had recommended keto because of a study. A study showed that a high-fat, low-carb diet would allow chemo and radiation to be more effective.

It was a blessing that I didn’t feel called to proceed with treatment in Texas, and that recommended the same treatment that had already been prescribed. That visit further supported my decision to move forward with my treatment at home. It was a prayer that had been answered.

I want to say that from the very moment of diagnosis and mention of surgery, I had a huge support group. My friends and boss from a previous job showed up outside my hospital window the morning after diagnosis. My entire CrossFit community and friends rallied around me providing a meal train, thoughtful handwritten cards, constant prayers, and check-ins. A fundraiser that I will talk more about in the next post. Friends that dropped everything to be with me and support me in any way they possibly could. My husband, my daughter, my parents, and my friends. My best friend dropped everything for weeks to be by my side.

This is only the beginning of my story.

To be continued…